the letter

I'm going to put a myspace comment I sent to my little sister a couple minutes ago because I know she wont approve it. I felt like putting it on here because this is where I put all my other stupid, angry rants. She keeps putting...umm, 'sugestive' photos on myspace and one with the caption "I dont not have cum on my tongue" really annoyed me.

You're a fucking moron. You're going to end up pregnant and barefoot in the gutter like an airhead whore cause you don't know the difference between a condom and a plastic bag. You're my little sister and you are twelve. Your not even a fucking teenager yet. You still run aroung tucking teddy bears into bed and watching Hannah Montana. This is so stupid. And you know who thinks this looks good? Other dumbshits who think they're hot because they're in highschool and paedophiles. You and other little KIDS in year seven would have no fucking clue how many 40-something year-olds are jacking off to you pointless myspace bullshit. And don't tell me that they can't see it because your profiles private because you will accept anyone without red hair. You need to wake up to your self. I'm not saying this because I'm trying to piss you off, I'm saying it because you'll end up a dog who gets no respect and sleeps around cause your an easy tramp. You my baby sister and the nicest person in the world when your not around complete idoits who do this all the time. It's not funny, Gracie. I'm sure as fuck not laughing, I'm friggin crying as im typing. You might think its hilarious but at least i care. these other kids that comment you saying they love you and your photos are hot or whatever, they obviously don't care because they're condoning something that is stupid and dangerous. Your better than that. Your a smart person, but as gullable as all hell. Don't believe every fairy tale you hear. I love you.

the dog

Mum and I keep having this argument about me getting a dog. One minute she says yes, next a flat out no. The this that really pisses me off is that as soon as I start proving my point, she shuts up and refuses to talk to me because shes 'not in the mood'. The reason I ant a dog is so I have someone to talk to. I've always loved dogs and had them until I was about 13. I had a dog called Ricky and he was my best friend in a family where my mum constantly decides shes 'not in the mood' to make her kids dinner, tells us we're 'not her problem' on dads weekend and tells me I never appreciate anything and a sister who hates me, calls me stupid things like fat and frequently tells to 'go kill myself'.
I told mum that dad thought it was rediculous that she has be in the right mood to feed us and she said something like 'thats what you do, you don't get your own way so you say things just to hurt people. Felt like telling her to go and fuck her boyfriend unless she was cheating on him too.
Can't wait for year 10 to finish so I can live at dads and stop being treated like crap.

the fighting you have when your not fighting

Sick. Not psyically sick. Just...sick. (i'm going to resort to crappy code names). A told L on the bus that she felt like I was shutting her out. I really couldn't care less at the moment. She was being enough of a smart-arse about it anyway. Gave me one of those stupid 'I-don't-care-because-I'm-better-than-you' looks she does all the time and just walked off the bus. I should probably be telling her this rather than putting it on the internet, but that'll just give her something to argue about.
It's not just her that does it. I should probably add that.
I feel sick all the time. I keep streesing myself and getting headaches. I find myself resenting the people I'm around so much I feel like vomiting. At least they've started to notice I'm not acting normal. Not sure if thats really good or not.
Anyways, now L (getting sick of the intials...) now knows that his 'bestest buddy' is pissing the shit out of me. I shouldn't blame him, and I'm not sure I do, it just seems like people choose him over me everytime there's a chance. I can't change that, so whats the point of saying anything?

I hate my sister. Treats me like I'm a dog. She couldn't tell a stick from a pencil. The whore eats twice as much as me, and then asks me why I eat all the food in the house. All I want to do is sleep. Not to sound to dramatic but when I'm asleep I can't sit in selfishness, crying over why I'm always second best. I honestly thought at the beginning of the year I had people who like me. I'll just blame it on myself, that's what I do. That's what makes sense...

the thinking

At home. Had a headache this morning and didn't really feel like going to school and putting up with shit from people who supposedly like me. That is until someone better comes along.
Moving on, I'm watching The Big Bang Theory on that new Go! channel. I never really realised how much I liked it. Especially the theme song. Facts put into a humourous verse, I'd have to like it. It's clever and I get it, makes me feel smart.

I've decided to do this blog thing seriously. And I promise to write anything and everything I'm thinking about. Like right now I'm looking at my boobs as I type. Hmm, classy.

I'm waiting for Loui's party, sorry, partay. It should be fun. I've never really like parties though. It's either mine and I'm the centre of attention (which I hate) or it's someone elses and I'm with the small group, talking quietly in the corner. Not that that's a bad thing, Bridget's party was made more enjoyable because of quiet talking in the corner. Or crying under a clothes line.I wish I could lose a little fat off my arms. Going off on a tangent.
In the end, what ever I do will end up in irrelevent words on the internet.

the start

I've decided to create a bloggy thing (obviously) to try and keep my blogging, or absence of, separate from my myspacing in hope to compel myself to write stuff down again. Because I kind of like it.

If your looking at this and wondering what the hell is up with my blog's title, the answer is: I'm not really sure either. It has basically no relevance to anything other than what the display on my tv said at the exact time that I was looking for a new and exciting Twitter username. A feeble attempt to add colour and movement. Before I start, I should warn you that my 'style', I guess you could call it, of writing is a vibrant mix of both proper english featuring a number of big words and some strange words that I've made up and use in my everyday communicationing.

The main reason I decided to spontaniously start a blog is because of Loui's complaining about only having one follower. I am now his second.

I like writing on the internet because it's like a mumble. It's there for anyone to hear when you don't really want to tell anyone. That, and my computer's in my room so it kind of feels like it really is mine, posting it from where I spend the majority of my time. Alone and thinking. I like thinking, even though I tend not to frequently.

I could go into paragraphs analysing myself, but then you'd get bored and wont read it anymore. That and I have no idea where to begin. I don't find myself in anyway remarkable and therefore don't know if there is anything really different enough to tell people. I'm human and I'm blogging, thats all you really need to know.