the ten songs

I was reading a whole heap of 'Worst Songs of All Time Lists' last night and realised that some of the songs were so hilariously bad that I had to love them. It kind of hard to pick a song that's so bad it's well... bad. (Except for What's Your Flavour/Flava - Craig David and I Love Pop Music - Ben Lee) Instead of making a list of the best songs or the worst songs, I'm going to do both. Mostly because if the RTA hadn't screwed me around yesterday, I'd most likely be driving now...





10.Wasabi - Lee Harding

Yet another past Idol contestant faded into obscurity. And, to be honest, so did his song. It makes very little sense and he scares me. But, he is singing about condiments - which instantly makes a song memorable. RIP, Lee Harding's career, though.

9. Macarena - Los Del Rio

"Something, something, something, something, macarena! Something, something, something, something macarena. Ah, something, something, something, something macarena! Heeeeeeey, MACARENA!" It's one of the very few dance-songs that I know the dance to. This and the Ketchup Song.

8. The Ketchup Song - Las Ketchup

"I said a-hey a-ha, a-something a-something a-something,something something, a-something a-thingy with the boogie and the somethingy beat". Yes, it's on my iPod. No, I don't care. When it came out it was the coolest thing to know the dance (as opposed to now where the coolest thing is to know who hates who). It's so catchy. And I'm pretty sure they're singing about Tomato Sauce in Spanish/Spanglish while on a beach. What more does a song need?? Exactly.

7. I'm Blue - Eiffel 65
"I'm blue, da ba de da ba die" Again, pointless and awesome. If you don't agree, think of the fun hours you can spend filling in the missing lyrics with friends and family... "I'm blue, if I were green I would die..."

6. Who Let the Dogs Out - Baha Men
A title that defies the laws of punctuation. I respect their rebelliousness, though I still don't know who let the dogs out...

5. Achy, Breaky Heart - Billy Ray Cyrus
Hate me all you want, but I think it's outrageously, chessily AWESOME! The lyrics are bad, the music is bad, the tune is bad and the hair was definitely bad. I can't help but like it for it's badness, no matter how painful it is.

4. Strawberry Kisses - Nikki Webster

A twelve year old Australian girl who somehow found a way to sing in an American accent... About wishing she could pash some guy who tastes like strawberries. Everybody loved in in primary school (even I admittedly bought the CD - how embarrassing) and I thought I hate-hated it until I heard it again last night. It's so corny (and kinda bogan-y) that it makes me want to dance like Brittany Spears. And the film clip is very 2001 and therefore cool. Nikki Webster is [was] AWESOME!!

3.Livin La Vida Loca - Ricky Martin

My first loves were Greg Wiggle, the guy with trumpet in the Hooley Dooleys and Ricky Martin. I loved Ricky Martin. I had his CD, I new his songs, and I loved him. Sure, the words I sang ( and most of the words he sang, I'm sure) didn't exist but I sang them none the less. And man he can dance... Even though this song is so hideously bad - and I know it - I like it.

I still love Ricky Martin.

2. Hello - Lionel Ritchie

"Hello? Is it me you're looking for?" No, she's blind. Seriously, a creepy guy stalking a blind girl that does stuff with clay (who is also his STUDENT). It's very stalker-y. To understand the full Lionel Ritchie scariness, you have to read the lyrics and watch the clip. Why do I like it? It's an awesome song to belt out in the middle of nothingness - until it gets stuck in your head for a week - and I don't mind a bit of friendly stalking :).

1. The Cheeky Song (Touch My Bum) - The Cheeky Girls

I only first heard this last night and i fucking love it. They're Romanian twins in short-shorts singing about their butts - how much more hilariously sweet can you get? YouTube it, you will thank me. And then watch their Christmas song, "Cheeky Christmas" - Fun. For. Hours.